


Where You Water It

by lantadyme



Category: Loonatics Unleashed
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-19
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2019-02-04 03:45:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12762450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lantadyme/pseuds/lantadyme
Summary: Rev wants to catch up with his brother, he's just not sure exactly how.





	Where You Water It

He's two minutes early for the final bell, his hands balled up nervous at his sides because even if he is in his civilian colors, they offer him little invisibility considering he used to go to school here. His old high school is unchanged except for the way Rev can feel the thousand-some students all antsy in their desks as they wait for school to release them. If he wanted he could pinpoint exactly which one is Rip, could mentally follow him through the hallways as he unloads books into his locker and drags his feet on the way out the front doors. Somehow Rev was expecting at least one friend to come dragging out with him, but his brother takes the steps alone, hands deep in his pockets, not looking excited for the drive home with his mother behind the wheel.

Which, honestly, makes Rev's heart skip a beat to know he's breaking that pattern. "Hey, Rip!" he calls from the sidewalk, watching as Rip jolts to a halt, staring at him for a long moment before shifting direction to walk over.

"What're you doing here?" he asks, confusion on his face.

Rev shrugs. "Well, I thought that after everything that happened when you and the folks visited me, I should really do my best to make the whole fiasco up to you. Uh. To just you, I mean. Not Mom and Pop. It feels like I barely even talked to you, and considering that we haven't spoken all that much since I left for school in the first place, I just—" He shifts his feet, tapping the toes of one foot and then the other against the cracked concrete, trying to bleed nervous energy without veering the conversation way off topic. "If you don't have plans or anything would you be up to maybe getting food or something, maybe some time to actually talk, just the two of us, no parents interfering?"

Rip still has that confused look on his face but Rev watches as the offer of free food takes root in his brother's brain, mentally counting the bills of his allowance he has left and how maybe he can actually buy something for himself if he doesn't have to spend it on snacks.

"Sure I guess," Rip says. "I don't have a lot of homework. It'd, um, be nice to get out of the house for a while."

"Yeah. That's what I thought. Or, that's what I meant, anyway, by the offer. I gave Mom a call, told her there's a project from school you asked me to help you out with beforehand so you don't have to worry about them. Just. You know. A trip to the city with your brother? If you're up to it?"

"I already said yes, Rev."

"I-I know. I heard you." He winces, kicking himself for how much he knows Rip hates having things he says ignored. "Sorry, I get a little carried away sometimes."

 

Rip orders blueberry waffles and Rev orders chocolate chip pancakes with extra whipped cream. IHOP isn't the kind of restaurant either of their parents would find acceptable for any meal of the day, but definitely not for between lunch and dinner. Rip seems charmed by Rev's rebellious choice. Once their food arrives Rev balls his hands under the table, determined to not simply inhale the entire plate before his brother can get a bite in.

"So what's the catch here?" Rip finally asks, slowly cutting his waffles. "I'm pretty sure you didn't run out here just to buy me breakfast. If you wanted to do that you'd have invited Mom and Pop too."

Rev laughs nervously, not sure what to say, not sure what his goal is other than giving Rip an excuse to get home later than usual. "I guess I just wanted to, I don't know, apologize for everything?"

"I'm the one that broke into your base and stole alien technology and trashed half the city. Shouldn't I be the one apologizing?"

"I guess technically that would make the most sense but honestly I feel like I should shoulder most of the blame for that. You barely talk to your little brother for a couple years and then expect to waltz back into the family without having to, you know, actually rebuild some of those relationship ties I've definitely let slip while I was gone. I mean, I've been running around living my life, getting superpowers and saving the world, visiting other planets and fighting aliens, building giant laser cannons, and you've been. What? You're graduating next year and I don't even know if you went to junior prom. If you have a girlfriend or maybe a boyfriend or whatever the term is for gender neutral significant other or maybe it's you with the gender neutral identification now or—"

"I'm not trans, Rev," Rip deadpans.

"I'm not saying you are or you aren't!" He throws up his hands defensively, wincing at how he's fumbling this. "I'm not trying to insinuate anything, okay, I'm just saying that I don't know anything about your life anymore. I used to know these kinds of things but then I left and—" He lets himself trail off, feeling how lacking his understanding of his brother is now, and how much that's Rev's own fault for not making the effort to keep in touch. "I want to catch up with you. What've you been doing for the last three years while I've been away?"

It's too much to ask all at once and Rev knows that the second it's out of his mouth, but he can't take it back now. Rip just shrugs. "I dunno. Same as I was before you left. School's the same. Home's the same. No girlfriend. No significant others or gender stuff. Nothing's really different besides you being gone."

That isn't what Rev wanted but maybe it's what he deserves. "I guess that's fair."

But Rip does glance up at him, some of Rev's own nervousness mirrored in his eyes. This is something both of them are going to have to work at and even if Rip doesn't know what to say, how to sum up three years of living under the same roof as his overbearing parents with no one else to redirect that attention, he does want to try. Rev can see that much.

"I'm not tryin' to shut you down, okay? I just don't really know what to say. School sucks, but I guess it's better than last year. I nearly flunked three classes last year. I dunno why. Couldn't pay attention. Didn't want to go. Didn't wanna even get out of bed most of the time but I can't stay home with them either, telling me how lazy I am and how I'm not putting any effort into anything. Like I don't already know that. Sometimes I still feel like I want to stay in bed all the time but Pop wants me to do college so I have to improve my grades."

"Let me guess, he wants you to major in business and marketing."

"Accounting actually. He says I'm no good for anything that involves working with people."

Rev winces, a tiny flash of anger igniting in his heart. "He's wrong, you know. You always have good marketing ideas. He just doesn't listen."

"Tell me about it." Rip spears waffles on his fork, dragging them through powdered sugar. "What about you? I mean, I know you're a hero and everything now, but I just hear about it on the news. What does building giant laser cannons mean? How many different planets have you visited?"

"Strictly speaking, none, since most of the time when we're involved with an extraterrestrial combat deploy the team splits up and I'm usually needed to hang back for tech support. But I have set foot on a huge giant ridiculously massive asteroid that was coincidentally on a collision course with Acmetropolis before we touched down and set a ton of high grade explosives at specific stress fractures, and by we I mean mostly me since the others were busy getting into fights with alien energy manifestations that ended up being the brother of my boss, who, maybe I shouldn't be talking about this actually since it's classified. But regardless I've seen a lot of cool stuff ever since I got my powers and it's exciting to know there's only going to be more where that came from."

"Sounds like your life really is better without us in it, huh?" Rip mutters, not quite looking up from his plate.

"Uh. Well I don't know about that." A bolt of familiar panic goes through Rev at having his entire meaning go so wrong in his brother's ears. "I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm proud of what I do. I've learned more about mechanical and electrical engineering and computer technology and software programming in the last couple years than I think I ever would have learned working with Pop the way he wanted me to when I finished school. Not that I've finished, because I still haven't. I've just needed to learn those things on the fly to be anywhere near helpful while building stuff like giant laser cannons or defensive matrix repulsion shields or high-energy laser magnification or all kinds of other gadgetry you'd be crazy to be building unless of course you end up on a superhero team. It's been such a blast and, I mean, it's not that I don't miss you guys, because I do even though I'm super busy. There's just so much to occupy myself with now, and I guess that's a little bit my fault since you learn to pick up hobbies at an explosive rate when you develop super speed. I was bored out of my skull by the second week and keeping myself from the tedium does turn into a bit of a whirlwind on occasion where I just totally lose track of what I was doing the day before and hyper-focus through three entire nights trying to write an auto-targeting program for hydrogen propelled space torpedoes. I mean how many products does Pop market that he can brag use actual rocket science? Probably not that many but I already have a halfway decent grasp on it just from experimentation and the ten or so textbooks I've read trying to give my self the fastest crash course possible."

The excitement of being able to share his life with Rip again falters as his brother still doesn't look up from his plate, as what he says keeps deviating back to what he's proud about instead of the apology he wants to make more solid. Rev peels back.

"S-sorry. That's way too much all at once. I do this sometimes, I lose track of what I'm saying."

"I noticed. At home you'd ping pong all over the place. I thought it was because you didn't want to talk to Pop about business stuff besides the project, but—" Rip glances back up at him, something a little vulnerable in his eyes as he psyches himself up to say more, to meet Rev step for step here. "That's not it, is it? You're different now. I mean, you always talked fast but now when you talk sometimes it's like you get lost halfway through. That's the speed, isn't it?"

The way Rip says it makes it feel less like a judgment and more like something he's realizing now that the two of them are having an actual conversation one on one. And that trips Rev up, because even with three years of learning through trial and error how to adapt to this unexpected side-effect of his powers, it's still always a shock to have someone call it so plainly. To have them pull him aside and ask privately how Rev is coping with it.

"Yeah, it's the speed." He laughs, nervousness crystallizing into a weird uncomfortable relief that his brother has caught on to a huge change in Rev's life. "My brain-to-mouth filter has definitely gotten a lot thinner since I got my powers. I can talk about as fast as I can think now and sometimes it's kinda hard to shut it off when certain thoughts link up to other thoughts and I go off on tangents a lot I know but I mean, right after I got them and Zadavia contacted me to join the Loonatics I tried to fight it by not talking unless it was directly to communicate with someone, and that was useful but it really leaves me feeling a little stir crazy like I want to run a couple dozen laps around the city but harder to hold in, because it's a weird mix of verbal impulse tidal wave and expectant frustration every time I open my mouth because usually someone misses the first two or three sentences and asks for the short version. And the short version is great! It's important in a pinch and don't think I haven't remembered how to be succinct when I need to. That's kinda the type of skill you need to keep honed when you're protecting your entire planet from the immeasurable threat of every super baddie out in the limitless expanses of space possibly wanting to blow us sky high at any given moment, or maybe just subjugate us for forced labor or food or energy generation or whatever other evil scheme they can think of. It's important to be able to communicate like that. Hey! Watch out for that huge deadly missile! Stop moving! It's a mine field and I just ran into about ten of 'em and I don't think I can feel my feet from the concussion blast. I'm okay, the suit absorbed the worst of it but man! It is not fun, I don't recommend it, hold your ground until Tech finds a way to take them all out."

He's rambling and he hates it, hates the way the words cascade out of him sometimes and how he almost can't get them to stop. And it's not as hard when he knows everyone in the room has already tuned him out, white noise in the background of their uninterrupted conversation, but Rip hasn't. That entire messy speech and still Rip is looking at him and hearing every single word. The confused concern in his brother's eyes makes Rev want to rip his feathers out with that familiar anxious guilt he feels every time someone actually cares enough to listen and hear what Rev's trying to say, even if the words are all the wrong ones.

"Sorry! Sorry, I'll stop, I know you didn't ask for this it just kind of all—"

"Don't stop. What're you tryin' to say, Rev?"

"I don't know. I never know anymore, it's all this mess of words and phrases and facts and ideas all trying to get out at the same time and instead of saying the thing that makes the most sense I just talk and talk and I love my powers, please don't think I don't, it's just that sometimes I wish I didn't feel like people completely dismiss anything I say simply because I can't make my point immediately. Because everything falls out at once. I know I'm annoying, okay, I definitely know that and I understand and it's totally fine if people can't follow my train of thought because heck! Sometimes even I can't follow my train of thought. I'm just so tired, I guess. I feel like I haven't sat down and had a real conversation with someone in months. I used to have school at the very least but school is different now ever since Tech helped me get into a really accelerated program, so I'm juggling three semesters at once on top of protecting the planet and helping Tech iron out like two dozen patents simultaneously, and I guess the couple really simple projects I'm working on just by myself which are going pretty slowly honestly. Don't tell Pop, okay, he'll want to see what I'm working on and I really really really don't want his input on them. There's just so much going on and I guess I kind of like not being home anymore. I like that Mom and Pop aren't always there looking over my shoulder, prying into what I'm doing and how every idea I have can be twisted into something useful for the company, how it's profitable, how it can be more profitable with these couple of changes even if turning it into a quick buck completely derails my entire point for the project. What if I just want to have a little fun for once? What if I just want something to be mine for once? Just mine? Nobody else's. God, I guess that's really selfish and I know and I should probably feel guilty for how I don't feel sorry about it at all. I'm twenty-one and I think I should be able to have something that's just mine. I should be able to have a job I like, something that has nothing to do with the family business, something that's just what I chose and no one else gets to tell me I'm doing it wrong or that I have no ambition or that I need to do everything exactly how Pop says or else what's even the point, it's just a waste of time and money, I'm just a waste of time and money and I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it—"

And he's been staring at his plate as the words just pour out of him, too ashamed to watch Rip swallow this torrent of scatterbrained premeditated insecurity. But he glances up now and something in his brother's eyes has lit up like a birthday candle. Something he's seen flicker and fade every time their father doesn't even bother to listen to what Rip's said, every time the two of them had worked on something together and in the end it was only Rev that their father chose to praise, every time Rip's made an effort to try to get their father to notice something he's done, anything he's done, and had the entire thing fall on nothing but uninterested ears. It's burning bright in his eyes now, because even if Rev doesn't know what his point is here, what he's trying to say and how to say it, just that honest admission that their father has been smothering Rev as much as he's been smothering Rip has rebuilt a bridge between them that Rev hadn't even realized he'd burned.

"I'm sorry I left you alone with them," he says, and makes himself stop, makes the whole deluge of apologies pile up cluttered in his mouth to let that one hang. To let that be the important message he wants Rip to hear. "I went to college and got so wrapped up in finally having my own life for once, no outside rudder steering everything for once, and when I realized that even if I had to work two jobs to keep myself afloat I still never wanted to go back I just—" He takes a breath, holding the words behind clenched teeth for a moment, desperately trying to find his point. "—I left you and I shouldn't have because I'd finally realized how hard it is to live at home when everything you do has to revolve around what Pop wants it to revolve around. It's hard and I'm sorry. You didn't deserve to be abandoned like that."

Rip stares at him for a long time, completely shell-shocked by that apology. Rev takes a big forkful of pancakes and makes himself chew slowly to give his brother time to think. Because even if Rip had been angry about it, he probably never thought he was in the right to feel that way, to be hurt by something that had never been a conscious decision on Rev's part. Because god knows Rev's spent the last three years slowly coming to the realization that even if his father never meant him any harm with his expectations, the emotional turmoil it'd caused was real anyway. And if it was hard for Rev, it's probably double as hard for Rip.

"I was never mad that you went to school," Rip says eventually, his voice unsure as he sidesteps an issue he needs more time to think on than the minute it's taking Rev to work through the food on his plate.

And that's fair. Rev can respect that. "You were mad that I got superpowers, though."

"Well yeah because—" he pauses, hands moving like he can convey a sense of personal injustice he doesn't have the words to fully express. "Because you always get everything! You always get everything right, even when it's an accident. You're always the one who Pop's proud of, always the one with the good ideas. My ideas are trash. Everything I do is a disappointment and always has been. What's even the point of trying after your brother saves the planet five times like it's nothing?"

That twists the knife in Rev's heart. "But they're not proud of me for that."

"I know. They're only ever proud of you if you live up to their expectations of what they should be proud of you for. Otherwise it's just oh that's nice, son. When are you going to get over this phase, Rip? I could come up with the cure for cancer but as long as Pop can't sell it under the Runner Enterprises name he would never care one bit."

And maybe that's blown out of proportion but considering that Rev _has_ saved the planet five times and still his parents are doing their passive-aggressive suggestions that he quit the silly volunteer work and come back to contribute to the company, well—

"Look, I—" Rev starts and then stops himself, reshuffling the cards in his head before he lays them out all wrong again. "This probably isn't a great plan since I'm not really good at those, those are more Ace's thing, but it's my idea and it's one I want your input on if you'll have me. I have some money. We don't get paid but Tech pays me a percentage of his patent revenue for basically being five assistants in one, so I've been saving, and after everything that went down with the Robo Amigo I've been thinking that—" And this feels so threadbare, like he's flying by the seat of his pants because even if he's had the basic framework for this idea spinning in his head for a long agonizing week, it hasn't come together into words until right this second. And with something that holds this much gravity, Rev is terrified he'll mess it up. That the words will come out diluted into references and nonsense like they do so often these days. He makes himself take a breath, makes himself swallow all the nerves rising in his throat, and tries to actually get this right. "I know you still have senior year to go but I thought maybe if you wanted to look around at schools near HQ I could find an apartment nearby, pay your rent and tuition while you finished up high school. And after that we could look at universities together. So you wouldn't have to watch Pop decide where you go and what you major in. So you wouldn't have to be stuck at home anymore. Just hypothetically, okay! I don't want to put any pressure on you, I think we both know how much pressure you're already under. Just. If that's something you'd be willing to try, I'd like to do that for you."

Rev keeps his mouth shut. Five different outcomes are spinning dizzying tales inside Rev's head as he fights to keep them inside, fights to let Rip be the one to make this decision. He watches as the shock and surprise washes over his brother's face all over again, watches that heartbreaking flicker of desperate hope warm in his eyes.

"You—" Rip starts, and then stops as the words fail to happen. "Are you asking me to move in with you?"

The floodgates lurch open. "No no no, it's actually forbidden in our contracts to have civilians living in the headquarters so it'd legally have to be an outside residence or I guess also boarding school is on the table but all I ever hear about those kinds of schools is sort of nightmareish so I don't want to lean in that direction right off the bat if you know what I mean. And I guess if you really wanted I could live there with you and commute to work since I can run it with no problem but oh god I need to stop talking—"

"Dude, it's okay."

"I just don't want to talk over you or make some decision for you that you didn't choose for yourself. I was miserable my entire first two semesters because Pop decided I would major in business and marketing, not electrical engineering like I wanted, and when I tried to change my major he didn't want to pay for any of my elective courses anymore. I know how terrifying it is when you feel like you have no control over your own life and no choices and no safety net to speak of. I'd never want to be the one to force that on you, okay? I'm trying really really hard not to be Pop here. I spend a lot of time trying not to be him everywhere I go."

Rip looks at him for a long moment again, Rev watching as his brother slowly puts together how much of an ongoing conscious decision this is for Rev. How much of an ongoing conscious decision he's been making anytime he's spoken to anyone over the past three years, that spectre of his father always lurking in the corners of his mind. Then Rip looks away, glances to the side at his book bag, the black fabric faded and worn with use. He takes his time to think about the offer and Rev refuses to disrespect that.

"I think that'd be cool. I mean. I have friends at school, but—" And he trails off again, noncommittal.

"They've, uh, been getting you through the years, haven't they?"

He says it with experience, remembering the ways he made sure he would be busy after school, late into the afternoon to the point of getting home after dark sometimes. Friends he hasn't spoken to since he left for college. Friends he isn't sure would know what to do with him now that he runs at the mouth like a busted fire hydrant.

"Yeah," Rip says, more definite decision in his voice this time. "I'd like to try, though, I think. Or, looking around at schools at least. It'd be nice to get away from home for a while. I'd like that a lot, actually."

And the anxiety that's been building in Rev's chest finally breaks, the seven or eight possibilities for this conversation finally collapsing into the one he was secretly wishing for, the one he didn't dare to gamble would ever actually happen until Rip spoke those words himself. He breaks out in a grin, excitement quivering in his legs as he holds the edge of the table in a vicegrip, determined to stay seated with his brother despite himself.

"Really?" he asks, a little breathless.

Rip laughs, watching Rev wear his enthusiasm so obviously. "Yeah. "

"Wow okay this is awesome. I have so many ideas but I haven't actually done any looking at apartments or schools or anything really because it'd be a little ridiculous to start planning ahead on something that I hadn't figured out for myself yet, much less run it past you. But I do know the layout of the city around HQ like the back of my hand at this point so I know what a lot of your options are. This is so cool, there's Ridgeview Academy on Crescent Avenue which is probably the most prestigious school in the county although considering I think you don't want to pick a school where they're going to expect so much of you, you probably want to chill a little for a while—"

"Rev, dude," Rip interrupts with a fond smile. "Slow down."

"Right, right, sorry!"

"Mom and Pop aren't going to like this."

"I don't care about what they want," Rev says, no doubt in his voice, and for that being the first time he's said those words it still surprises him. "I care about what you want. If they get mad they're gonna have to come through me first."

Rip looks at him, also caught off guard, paging through all the ways they both know their parents will try to keep Rip from leaving. But he swallows, his mind made up. "I'm free Saturday."

That's four days away. So close it has Rev vibrating, so far in super speed time it feels like watching paint dry. But he's determined and so is Rip, and for the first time in a long time it feels like they're back on the same page like Rev's always wanted them to be.

"All right, Saturday. It's a date."

 


End file.
